What an amazing development! By the great canole, who could have possibly foreseen this?
Well, me, for one.
Anyways!
Before I completely forgot about this post (which was roughly two weeks ago), I was writing about the Last Airbender movie. I’ll make it short, so that we could get to the meat and bones of this post. It’s crap. Utter crap. Even I, a lover of crap movies, think it’s way too much crap for me. So take it from a guy who knows his shitty movies and DENOUNCE THIS TRAVESTY!
And on to other stuff.
The old man is building a house. It’s been on the agenda for quite a while and the start was made last year, but it wasn’t till this summer that there was any actual work done on the foundation. We pretty much finished it today. I say “we” because, believe it or not, The Ulf helped out. I was rooting up the marker posts when thoughts started streaming into my head. I’ll let you partake in some of the workings of my mind and write up some that I can still recall.
So, without further ado, I point you towards a recently created segment of my fine little blog, which I’ve cunningly titled
- “This Arboreal Abomination is proving difficult to vanquish.”
- “Critical hit, fuck yeah!”
- “You know what would fix you right up? A good shoveling. That’s what you need. A swift shovel right to the freaking cranium. Trust me, I’m a doctor.”
The following took place after I’d gotten the heavy sledgehammer from the shed in order to aid me.
- “Oh yeah, now you’ve angered the God of Thunder. The Hammer’s coming down on you.”
- “What’s the time? Well, kind sir, it’s HAMMERTIME!” *whack!*
- “Cower beneath my steely might!”
- “The Hammer claims another woody foe! Its power is unstoppable!”
- “Shiver, timbers, for Thor’s Avatar hath come!”
There was a slew of others as well, most lost to the tides of time. Alas, even I cannot keep track of everything I think during a day. Hells, I can’t even keep track of what I thought during the past 10 minutes. But it probably had something to do with bloody awesome music.
Speaking of which, Blind Guardian recently released a new album, titled At the Edge of Time. It’s very reminiscent of their earlier albums, being more EPIC FUCKING METAL! than POWER AND UNICORNS AND SWORDS METAL. The album starts off with epic rocking and doesn’t let up all the way to the end. There are a few ballads mixed in with the god-awesome metal and, amazingly enough, they rock just as hard. Somewhat surprisingly, Curse My Name sounds like an Irish folk song at times and Wheel of Time’s intro takes its styling from Persian music, but then they both bust out the electric guitars and double-bass drums. I swear, this is their best album since Nightfall in Middle-Earth and that thing broke the Epic! scale. I know I’m gushing, but I can’t help myself. I was rocking out and tossing my wild mane of hair before the first song got to its vocals and singing along by the second one (and I don’t even know the lyrics!).
Seriously, in the span of two minutes, I went from this:
To this:
And that is AWESOME! Honestly, I find myself not surprised. Blind Guardian has been my favorite band since I discovered it. To me, it’s the perfect mix of orchestral music and power metal, combined with a great voice and damnedly awesome lyrics. Sure, most of the time I hear something I would imagine drowning a potato would sound like, but it’s alright. Cause all in all, combined with the epic guitars, the heavy bass and the orchestra pounding away in the background, it’s awe-inspiring. If I were to ever again get in a fight, I believe that if someone were to play Nightfall, Noldor or Thorn while it’s going down, I would stand a rather good chance of winning, simply because the music inspires me to limit-breaking feats.
So yeah. Blind Guardian’s new album is made of AWESOME! and if you’re a fan of epic power metal, I urge you to pick it up. If you liked Nightfall in Middle-Earth, you’ll like this one. Trust me.
Also, I am considering making that Barney picture into the new blog header. Why? Well, because it sums the whole blog up so beautifully. Also, it’s head-tiltingly wtf. Come on, tell me honestly that your first thought upon seeing it wasn’t something along the lines of “Dude… what?”
Cheerio!
